I will start with Jillian, because it is more of an aside than the main topic that I would like to cover in this post. Yesterday (Saturday) was the last day of Jillian Michael's 30 day shred. It was still tough but we managed to push through. I haven't felt this good about my body in awhile and I am proud of our accomplishment. I really do love participating in and completing fitness and I already have another routine set up around the corner to keep up the hard work! I can't let myself deteriorate because Jillian is done.
So on to the meat of the topic which came up a lot this week. I am going to preface this by talking about myself for a moment. I have always sort of been a line jumper when it comes to the introverted and extroverted spectrum. I really enjoy large social gatherings, provided I know at least a few people, and I enjoy meeting new people. I can be outgoing and charming when I need to be. That being said, I also really prefer small groups and getting to know people. Whatever the setting, I know that people make any event or occasion and so the people I chose to spend my time with are highly valued. I'm at my happiest when I am with good friends.
There were two major events this week that I participated in that I really just didn't end up liking all that much. The first was a crew date. Now a crew date is not particularly common or heard of in the US, but essentially two groups, generally one all girl group and one all guy group, agree to meet for dinner and hang out and get to know each other. It is always assumed that plenty of drinking is to occur with the hope that in a group setting that is more relaxed people will open up. Plus there isn't the pressure of having to drive conversation. That being said, there really wasn't all that much conversation. As I sat at the Indian restaurant across from strangers I had only just met nearing the end of the night, I was struck by how little I knew about them. Everyone had gotten fairly drunk and I could tell that meeting new people in the sense that you actually get to know them was not really the purpose of the outing. Rather, this was a perfect example of a phenomena that seems quite popular among my generation in particular. What I will call "pick up" culture, in which the only purpose of a meeting is to find a casual partner. It is designed in such a way that there is a certain expectation that a casual one night stand is perfectly acceptable and given that everyone's inhibitions are low, common. As soon as the night was over and I could remember only one of the three gentleman's names and knew next to nothing about them, I dashed and turned in for the night. It is not that I don't see the appeal of the "pick up" culture and I certainly don't judge people for wanting or engaging in it. It isn't something I want at this point in my life. When I reflect on the types of relationships I want to foster and develop, the "pick up" culture guy is just not it.
Feeling naturally disappointed at the lack of fun I felt due to the strange social pressure of the "pick up" culture, I was quite hopeful that the ball that I was attending at St. Catherine's would be a redemption. I got all dressed up and Sara continued to masterfully do my hair and make up. Plus, given that the last day of Jillian was the morning of the ball, I also felt physically accomplished. I felt good in my dress, having to lace the corseted bodice about as far as was possible for the dress, and still finding that the top struggled to stay up.
When we got to St. Catz ball, I was hopeful. There was an amazing amount of things to do. Plenty of food, drink, shisha, dancing at one of 4-5 dance areas, and even laser tag. But was also readily apparent was that it was an overbooked ball. The food was perhaps the worst of it, as no semblance of a queue ever existed. Rather it was a mob of slightly tipsy people pushing, shoving, and grasping for what little food could be offered up at a time. I was surprised I even managed to snag a piece of, while admittedly warm and delicious, not worth the trouble, pizza. There were plenty of drinks, though none were particularly strong enough to alter my state of awareness. Similarly, people rudely bumped or poured their drinks all over my dress and within the first two hours, nice dark stains raced up and down the dark blue fabric. I was pissed and frustrated. The consumption of so much food and drink ultimately made me a bit lethargic, but I did enjoy some dancing. It was at this point though that I was struck by how few people I knew at the ball. There were plenty of Regent's people around, but of those I would count as friends, there were few and there was certainly a lack of archery and roleplaying society people, with whom I spend a lot of my time. As a result, I clung to Sara who was more than happy to accommodate. Probably the highlight of the night was when we found our mutual friend Amelia and got a chance to go through the photo booth.
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Overall though, I was once again struck with this "pick up" culture. At one point in the evening, when I was getting rather tired, a guy started hitting on me but it became quickly apparent that all he wanted was sex. I managed to get away and was at this point fed up with the ball. I unfortunately had to stay for the next two hours, as I couldn't leave Sara and I had her checked coat ticket. This gathering was nothing more than a Crewdate on a much larger scale with a few more things to do. I don't regret going as much as I wish more people that I knew and who actually cared about who I was as a person were there. Thankfully a friend kept me company via text late into the night, so that I wasn't entirely bored.
So what do these two events have in common. Drinking. I think that having such a rich drinking culture only furthers the "pick up" culture and I, at this moment in my life, do not like it. People make my life. Whether it be family or friends, I find that I can't enjoy the activities I do without at least some company. No, I don't need to be with people all the time and I can enjoy detoxing in my room with TV or movies. But when it comes to living and acting and doing...I would rather have a friend by my side.
Once again, this trip has revealed more about myself and my limitations. Who knows what will happen in the next week. Until then.
Adventures Await
KH
More Hair Pics! Look at how Sara has outdone herself!
Valentine's day Hair:
St. Catz Ball Hair:
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